So, someone sent this email to my inbox. They said we could use their real names, but I decided not to and changed it to Sasha and Monique. It's pretty long, but an interesting convo between these two girls. I think every girl can relate, since I've been through a similar situation: ________________________________  Sasha: Last night I went out and I uhhmmm got kinda drunk.  I don't really remember exactly WTF I was thinking about but I think I called my ex. Oops!  But the worse part is that I don't remember if I blocked my #. Okay so just my luck.........I just checked my phone bill on T-mobile.com and tell me why there's a big gap missing from 8pm-12:40am??? I called him somewhere around 11:30ish. So I can't see anything. WTF!!!!!I'm really hoping I'm going crazy and me thinking I've called him its just in my head. HELP!!!! Why cant I just get his # off my head?? P.S- T-mobile SUCKS!!!! I might called them and see what the deals is cuz I'm paying for a service and I'm sure not getting it! Monique: lol! Sasha, why don't u just call him for real, talk to him, and get over it? or actually move on with him. u obviously love him still! That's actually how I got over my ex, I talked to him, I seen he hasn't changed, and I kinda just moved on from there. Sasha:Yeah, but ur different. U're Martha Stewart. U're strrong : ) Plus your situation with "Mike" was different, or not? Don't really remember exactly. Anywho, I just cant. Even thought I believe in second chances and that people are able and capable to "change", I'm also a strong believer in determination and freedom of speech, and I expect a man to be able to fight (regardless of any obstacles) for what he really, truly desires. And him not doing, or giving me any signs of anything is really not worth risking anything for. Did I make any sense rite now? That's why I just gotta find a way to forget about him...............no matter what. Monique: Yeah I totally agree. Hmm....no Sasha u r much stronger than I. I stayed with "Mike" (the ex) knowing he was living with his x-girlfriend, and I was pretty much living there myself. So, u r much much stronger. I was crazy about a guy that I couldn't even have a conversation with, and who treated me like crapeezo. lol. But guys are different a lot of guys will let their pride get in their way. I guarantee u he's thinking about u as much as u r him. Sasha: I guess I am stronger than I think I am. But that does not make things any easier nor better, as a matter of fact because I am a strong I have strong beliefs. And the crazy shit is that I'm pass and I'm over the heartache. I don't miss him with heart, but with my mind. XoXo Sad me...... Monique: hmmm if u miss him with your mind I guess that means u CHOOSE to miss him? I think u miss him with your heart, or u let me know :/? Sasha:Yes! that's exactly what it is. I choose to miss him. Out of all My bad choices I've made in the past, choosing to miss him is a KILLER......but why do I torture myself by reminiscing about my past?? It's so complicated that I don't even have answers to my own questions- about my own life! Pathetic! I mean, I talked to him a week after we broke up. You know-CLOSURE. Whatever that stands for. I felt much better after our conversation or should I say my "Speech" because I did most of all the talking and did not want him to interrupt me in the middle. I guess now I feel that I should've said more or get into a more specific detail of what was going on. I guess it would've made a difference when it comes to being together, but I would have felt much better. And his PRIDE. WoW!! He's pride took over him, which eventually got to me and I got fed up! If 2 people are not on the same page working together, then they're working against each other. And that's what happened between us- we collapsed. We never did bother to build a foundation. I don't miss talking to him, I mean we hardly talk, so we were not on some "friends" shit. I just miss him being there.......How do people know "they are meant to be together"? Monique: In my opinion, people know they are meant together when there is good communication and trust. Like 25 yrs from now, you could still call your hubby during the day while u r at work and have a full conversation with him during his lunch. lol. I think that's how Bobbie and I will be..(when im ready.. which im not) I know Bobbie's the one because: 1. I love him 2. He has my back through thick and thin 3. We can talk for 5 hrs on the phone like we did when we were teenagers 4. He supports me in every decision i make, sometimes giving me advice. 5. Encourages me 6. Loves my family, although some of them are stupid he still respects them and more... So you know it's right when there are no problems .... and ...every time u talk it's not an argument. The thing with Mike, I didn't have NONE OF THOSE NUMBERS That I LISTED ABOVE, except that I loved him! couldn't even have a conversation with the guy. You r so beautiful and guys are falling for u, but it just takes so much time for a guy to realize what u r worth for some reason. I dunno..was this a long enough email lol? I still think u should call him and get it off your chest... coming from sum1 that's been through the same thing. Plus that guy BIG J that you met the other night, (lol), reminded u of your X. you wanna get this X thing totally of yer chest. Sasha: Love the # list. And yes! It's a long ass e-mail. But I love it!  You are totally rite! The guy basically becomes ur backbone and there should be no feeling afraid or like something is holding you back from speaking or showing any kind of emotion. I guess you just know, it feels rite. Like a good pair of shoes, you know it's meant to buy them the first time you try them on.....LOL And even though there might be some rough patches and bumpy roads ahead in a relationship, that should be no excuse to give up on love. rite? Understanding each other and actually analyzing how each other react to certain situations should be a knowledge to really keep in mind to further achieve this so call "LOVE" thing to the max. Cuz I do remember being happy with him, probably the happiest any guy has made me feel, but it didn't last long : ( I found myself crying most of the time. The funny part is that no guy has made me or seen me cry more times then he has. I'm usually the "tough guy" in relationships, but with him I threw my pride out the window and became very vulnerable. Crying to me became the outlet to any kind of frustration, sadness or disappointments. I considered myself to be a very wise girl, even though I don't feel the need to show it off all the time. But some things I just don't get. If the list below : ) is something that's major in a relationship(which I agree on) how is it that we both felt for guys that had none of the above? What were we really holding on to??? Monique: "Cuz I do remember being happy with him, probably the happiest any guy has made me feel, but it didn't last long : ( I found myself crying most of the time. The funny part is that no guy has made me or seen me cry more times then he has. I'm usually the "tough guy" in relationships, but with him I threw my pride out the window and became very vulnerable. Crying to me became the outlet to any kind of frustration, sadness or disappointments." Shasha omg! I could've sworn u took the words outta my mouth and typed it in that email!!!!! That is so crazy that u said that. "Mike" made me feel so insecure and like I just couldn't WIN! So I'd cry! While in other relationships I'm like "f u" and keep it moving lol. The reason why we are like that, LIKE ALL WOMEN, is cause we like what we can't have. We LOVE what we can't have. Deep down, I feel, every woman likes a fight, or an argument. With "Bobbie" (the newbie) everything is too perfect so sometimes I start an argument on purpose. lol. I stayed with Mike who was living with his X of 10 years. I just feel it's the way we are, but sometimes we hafta like.. Accept it when we find something good and hold on to it. Sasha: : ) Loves YA! I thought I was looking at my sent mail for a minute, till I realize it was a new one LOL I guess some things are really unexplainable. Well...... it will remain a big chapter in my life. Even though I sometimes wish things between me and him should've been different, I cannot be thankful enough for the break-up. I got to know myself a lot better and for all the shit I went thru (good or bad) has made me who I am right now. I love it, cuz I love me : ) And guess what??? I'm capable of loving someone other than myself!!! Ohh wait, I learn to love me 2 on the way. However, as some relationships might not be a "happily ever after", there's always a good lesson to learn. Like I tell myself; "While you might not be able to change how people or things are, you can change the way you think/feel about them" After all- it's ur world- so make the best of it!